Listening to Creation

I stayed in the Dolly Sods Wilderness/Scenic Area for the last two weeks of September this year. In the mornings I volunteered at the Allegheny Front Migration Observatory and in the afternoons I hiked and explored in the wilderness. Bedtime came early since I had to get up at 5 AM.

Near the end of my stay I was in a position of having to make some important, perhaps life changing, decisions. My thoughts were wavering between “do this” or “do that”. My indecisiveness was troubling. I awoke one night at 10:30 PM and went outside to use the bathroom. Even though it was cold and I was dressed only in a t-shirt and underwear, I couldn’t help but pause and appreciate the night sky — the Milky Way, with so many stars, was bright and easily visible. All of a sudden a shooting star flew across the sky — it was bright with a long tail and its path stretched all the way across the heavens. I watched as the tail slowly faded. Even though it lasted only about 2 seconds, it was spectacular. I waited a while hoping for another.

When I went back inside the trailer, I couldn’t fall asleep — I was in a “think-hole”.

At times during the late afternoons on Dolly Sods I had been catching up on my reading in Discover Magazine. One article explained how astronomers calculate the total number of stars in the universe by studying nearby galaxies, ones in which we can count the stars, to see how many it takes to make a galaxy shine. Then, based on detailed counts of the galaxies we can see, and making conservative estimates of how many we can’t see, they have estimated the total number of stars in the universe. Our universe contains at least 70 septillion stars — that’s 7 followed by 23 zeros. To put that number into something someone like me can sort of understand — that’s 10,000 stars for every grain of sand on the Earth.

That night, as I lay awake, I was thinking about the stars — how many there are, and the grains of sand — how many there are. It was mind boggling to me. Finally I thought, “Stop thinking about this. Go to sleep!” When that didn’t work, I got up and said to Jan, “I’m going for a walk.” She acknowledged me, but I don’t think she was fully awake. It was 1 AM.

I dressed to be comfortable in the cold early morning. A short distance away I stopped in the middle of the gravel roadway and looked up into the heavens. The silence was deafening — no people noises — only a few nature noises like the occasional singing insect hoping to attract a mate. I could also hear some migrating birds singing their night flight sounds — I believe they were thrushes. The peacefulness and sense of wonder was overwhelming. Then it happened – I got the “FEELING”! In my book, Rainbows, Bluebirds and Buffleheads, I mention the FEELING several times and relate a quote (by Nancy Newell in “This is the American Earth” by Ansel Adams) that, to me, best describes how I feel at these moments.

” You shall know the night — its space, its light, its music.
You shall see earth sink in darkness and the universe appear.
No roof shall shut you from the presence of the moon.
You shall see mountains rise in the transparent shadow before dawn.
You shall see — and feel! — first light, and hear a ripple in the stillness.
You shall enter the living shelter of the forest.
You shall walk where only the wind has walked before.
You shall know immensity, and see continuing the primeval forces of the world.
You shall know not one small segment but the whole of life, strange, miraculous, living, dying, changing….
You shall see storms arise, and, drenched and deafened, shall exult in them.
You shall top a rise and behold creation.
And you shall need the tongues of angels to tell what you have seen.”

I walked out the trail to the Allegheny Front and stood there looking out and up into the Milky Way of countless stars. I found that my questions about my life’s direction and purpose were now easily answered. My mind was clear. My soul was at peace with everything.

I got back to the trailer about 2:30 AM and easily fell asleep.